How to Say no: Do We Know Her?

Hey there on this insanely hot June afternoon. Let's talk about the sentence "no". Yes, it is a statement, a full sentence and doesn't need any explaining or definition. No in itself should be enough and should be respected. Lately, I've been learning the hard way, how to say no to people and not being taught or even learning how to say no at a young age has gotten me in a lot of trouble, and consequences happen with decisions, good or bad. Not saying no landed me in the Emergency Room on Saturday afternoon. After going to urgent care because I had passed out, they said that I needed to go to the ER so I went. Found out that my heartrate was in the 120s, I was dehydrated, and overly exhuasted. It gotten to the point that my body was under so much stress that it was shutting down little by little. It was a wake up call for me and I was thinking, these last few months have been so difficult with relationships, work, grad school, and so many other things. I realized that I was giving way too much of myself and that I needed to take a step back from everyone and as a good student, I am still learning. I'm better thank God, but still on the road to recovery. With Miss Louisiana being only 6 days away now, I realize that maybe there is a purpose to everything going on with my life, the falling through of a roommate, trying to find out where I can live for the next few weeks before I can find a new place. Money is tight, working all of the time. I realized that stress really does cause such a physcial effect on my body. But what I believe that I was created for such a time as this. No matter what happens next week, I know it's God ordained, that's how life works, in the big picture, God has His hand in everything that goes on in my life and your life- everyone's life. I have to trust in Him and His plan, because that is what's going to work. Not going to lie, sometimes I do stray from that...I mean, I'm human, and I go for the shiny sometimes but I always know where home is. It's with Him, and to me that's all that matters. I know where my roots are and who I am in Him, but sometimes that does get lost in translation and I have all of these huge dreams and big things to chase and I have to come back to Him and realize that He holds my life in His hands and no matterwhat happens, or who I say no to, or even how I do it, I know that He will always have my back. Life is difficult as a woman. You feel like you have to say yes to everything to prove a point, to hang with the big guns, the men, the CEOs. But if we take a step back and realize that saying no isn't a bad thing, maybe we can make more of an impact. It's a bad habit to say yes all of the time...I should know. Nothing good comes out of it. It's time to take back that word no, not see it in a negative light and let people know that we, as women, know how to put our foot down. You're probably asking me, "Lily, that's great and all, but you do realize that it's easier said than done...right?" YES YES YES. Absolutely, it's so much easier said than done because as humans we aren't programmed to go against the grain and it's hard for us to do so. Why? Because we are a herd species, not meant to be alone. We are scared of being alone, like...truly alone. But that's when I have to remember that I am not alone because I have the GOD OF THE UNIVERSE on my side!! I just forget that I do sometimes... and that's on me. I'm still learning as we all are. We woulnd't be anything without our thirst for wisdom. But anywho... here are a few ways to say no and things that will be helping me in the future! 1: Simply saying no ( a little obvious. I know) 2: I just don't think that I am able to handle that workload along with my other assignments, is there a way that we can delegate those responsibilities to someone else or push them to another day? 3: I need to take a step back, I don't think that this relationship is the best option for my mental health right now. 4: My emotional bandwith isn't up to par, so as of right now, I don't believe that this is a valid option for me. 5: Just sit in front of your mirror and practice saying no several times every day. It'll help 6: I need to take time for myself, I am overwhelmed and stressed out at the moment. 7: Don't say sorry for something that you shouldn't be sorry for. Like...I don't know, maybe taking care of yourself and the things that you already have in front of you? 8: lastly, NO! That is still a sentence like I told you. Of course as always, know that I love you, I am proud of you dear, and you will always be worth your heartbeat.